Affair Rationalizations: Who Stopped You?

BindleBundle

When a cheater sets off on the journey to Affairsville, they pack a few items into their bindle before chirpily skipping down the hackneyed path that many others have forged ahead of them. Not least in that little bundle of important items are the cheater’s rationalizations for their affair. These rationalizations come in …

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Once a Cheater Always a Cheater?

Kris Jenner Affair

“Once a cheater always a cheater“: It’s a phrase that can spark considerable debate within infidelity forums, where very few seem to take a neutral position on the subject. Those who are firmly opposed to the idea that a cheater will always be a cheater tend to be those who reconciled …

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Affairs: How Could You?

How Could You?! Something that most faithful partners struggle with is trying to understand how their cheater could cheat. What was the reasoning and thinking that led them to make the choice to have an affair? How could they ignore, break, or suspend their commitment to their partner and their …

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I Love You but I’m Not in Love With You!

Infidelity & Affair Help: Letting Go

So many faithful partners have heard these ten words when an affair is involved. It’s often the sentence that marks an ‘exit affair’ or one that the cheater has no intention of leaving. So many of the behaviors, justifications and dialog surrounding infidelity follow predictable patterns: “I love you but …

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Affairs & Infidelity: Choice not Addiction

Infidelity & Affair Help: Psychology

As we explored in It’s Not Infidelity - It’s Sex Addiction, despite popular culture labels, the idea of sex addiction is not based on any diagnostic criteria and was again recently excluded from the DSM (American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). Claiming ‘sex addiction’ as cause …

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Affair Help: The Modern Affair Myth

Affair Help: Affairs Can Save Marriages

I’ve previously addressed this absurd idea that affairs can somehow improve your relationship, with posts addressing this currently popular myth. This article by Dr Broder takes a similar tack, asking ‘Can an affair make your relationship stronger?’ There is a very simple and concise answer to the question he posed, …

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Affair Help: The Cheater Code Deciphered

It’s often a source of amusement in our Affair Help Chat Room that there is a Cheater’s Handbook out there somewhere. Perhaps a single dog-eared copy that gets passed around via the library system? Maybe it’s magically delivered by the affair equivalent of a stork when the choice to have …

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Affair Help: Do Affairs Save Marriages?

Do Affairs Save Marriages?

There are many articles that are similar to yesterday’s post Affairs Can Save a Marriage: Myth or Mendacity? that are extolling the virtues of having an affair and its positive effect on a relationship. Providing some balance of reality, in the face of the deluge of articles all ready to …

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Affairs Can Save a Marriage: Myth or Mendacity?

Affair Help: Affairs Can Save Marriages

So far I’ve avoided posting about this particularly abominable subject matter. Articles that claim that affairs can save relationships don’t do anything positive in terms of helping people understand infidelity and affairs, nor do they paint an accurate picture of the reality that affairs have on marriages. Women’s Affair Save …

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Affair Help: Excuses and Justifications

Psychology: Infidelity & Affair help

Affairs: “I Treated Myself to a Marital Crisis” by Aaron Ben-Zeév, Ph.D. Excuses for Having an Extramarital Affair “Whoever wants to be a judge of human nature should study people’s excuses.” ~ Hebbel “Fidelity is possible—anything is possible, if you’re stubborn and strong. But it’s not that important.” ~ Michelle …

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