My Affair Was Your Fault


Cheaters Who Google Imagine a world where websites can see the Google search terms you used to find their site. *Gasp!* *Shock!* Who knew?! Who gave them permission to know why I am on their site, using their resources? That’s damned unconstitutional! I don’t care about SEO and all that fancy website …

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The Reconciliation Jigsaw Puzzle

Infidelity Jigsaw Pieces

Common Troubles in Reconciliation My cheater doesn’t really ‘get it’. My cheater seems to be carrying on with life as normal, while I’m struggling. They say they’re sorry but it doesn’t feel enough. We’re reconciling but I’m miserable. I want to see change but I’m not. If these things sound …

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The Magic Reconciliation Recipe

Magic Reconciliation Recipe

The Magic Marital Formula: If They’re Selling, We’re Buying After an affair has been disclosed or discovered, the immediate intent is generally to keep the relationship together at all costs. It’s understandable as a knee-jerk reaction – faithful spouses and cheaters alike often cling to the familiarity and security that the relationship represents. When …

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Why Can’t My Cheater Choose?


Cheater Confusion One subject that we tackle regularly with faithful spouses is the question of why their cheater won’t choose. “Why can’t he just decide if he wants me or her, so that I can  move on?” “She can’t make up her mind and keeps saying she’s confused.” “He says …

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Affair Exposure: Brave or Manipulative?

Affair Exposure

You don’t have to look far to find a slew of sites that advocate the necessity and success of affair exposure, where the faithful spouse is advised to ‘out’ their cheater’s affair as a strategy to protect the marriage and bring about the demise of the affair relationship. It was highlighted …

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Non-Monogamy: Hold the Wrath?

Infidelity vs non-monogamy

Post-Affair Desire for Non-Monogamy I encounter many cheaters who, after their affair is discovered, make sudden pronouncements about how difficult monogamy is, how it’s unnatural, and how they really want an open marriage. Exploring this generally highlights that they don’t want an open marriage at all, as the very idea …

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My Cheater is a Victim of Affair Brainwashing


Look Into My Eyes … Visit any number of infidelity support boards and you will find numerous claims of affair partners brainwashing cheaters. It might sound ridiculous, but it’s a tempting narrative for someone who wants to believe that their cheater is not fully conscious of, or responsible for, their terrible …

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